It’s a rare grey & rainy day here.
The sound of the rain falling is a wonder. I took a cup of tea to the porch and sat for a moment just to soak it all in. A moment was all. As it is in the low forties outside I did not stay long.
I listened to the rain fall, washing away the remaining snow, puddling in my brown sleeping garden. Odd for February. Usually we keep snow until March.
I came back in glad for the warmth. Lit the candles and twinkle lights. Waiting for the kettle to whistle.
I am making it a cozy day trying to simply sink in and enjoying the rare silence around me. I am home alone, a wonderful treat for usually the house teams with life and sound.
I don’t know how much time I have left, but am savoring each moment. Even better is knowing that my Sweetheart has the kids with him taking care of a task I was dreading to do later in the week.
The tea is ready. Steam rising, I smile. It’s a little life I live, but one as full of beauty as I can make it.
When everyone pours back in I will pour tea out for them all and smiles and kisses. And I will be as glad of their return as I am of their temporary absence. An afternoon of games and fun is planned. Maybe a walk if the rain ceases.
I may have to bake something worthy of the day. It seems like a day for chocolate chip cookies, doesn’t it? Whatever I make will not matter as long as it is warm and sweet.
Honestly, grey days are ridiculously hard for me. It is as though without thinking I absorb the ashen sky into my very soul and all is bleak. Today I am actively fighting that feeling, desperately trying not to sink into the dismal day.
I am searching out the beauty, the life and clinging to a deep hope that reminds me the sun is still shining even if I cannot see it and that all is well even if a bit murky at the moment. This is my life: fighting to find the light in darkness. Working to create the beauty in small things. Focusing on the good, not the grey.
And so I sip my tea, play my music, breathe deep and smile to myself.